This really is an Xtreme Adventure, hopefully the most Xtreme Kirsten
ever faces! No dolls or doll items were harmed at all in this
adventure, so please do not worry. Notes at the end, but things
are pretty much OK. :) I hope you enjoy the adventure!
Dedicated to George C. Tilyou, circa 1907.*
Kirsten is an 18-inch-tall girl from 1854, and Nellie is
an 18-inch-tall girl from 1906. Mini Kit is a 6-inch-tall doll
from 1934. Their newest friend, May, is an 18-inch-tall girl from the 1920s.
And I live with them. :)
One day, I decided to go out of town for the weekend. An unexpected phone call made me cut my trip rather short.
I was prepared for the worst. When I got back to my apartment,
this is the sight that greeted me. I don't normally keep my table
in the kitchen.
"Welcome to the Bilge!" Mini Kit said.
"Oh!" Kirsten said. "Am I glad to see you, Miss Cheap Lady!"
I could see why. I went over to open the porch door...
...and things were rather messier than usual. Less carpet than usual, too.
"We heard this weird noise," Kirsten said.
Mini Kit said, "And then I looked down to see what was wrong and the carpet was all dark, like it was wet!"
"And then these people came in and started moving everything onto the
couch and out of the way of the water!" Kirsten said. "And then
someone moved us over here and they moved the table and they brought in giant fans with hoses on
them and it smelled funny until they ripped the carpet out!"
"Some stuff got wet," Mini Kit said, "and they made a really big mess!"
"I can see that," I said.
Always cheerful, Mini Kit added, "But pirates always have to deal with
their stuff getting wet, right? Now you can pretend to be a
"I wasn't scared at all," Kirsten insisted. "But is the floor dry yet? We called out to
Pegleg Sally all night but she didn't answer. I'm very worried
about her but I was afraid the water would drown us."
Hm. Apparently Kirsten was scared after all.
Pegleg Sally lay among the wreckage on the couch.
"The floor's almost all dry," I said.
Kirsten and Mini Kit climbed over.
"Hey, look!" Mini Kit said, brazenly sitting on Nellie's doll. "My headband!"
"Stop preening and get over here, Mini Kit!" Kirsten yelled.
Mini Kit was so worried she didn't even tie her shoes.
"Pegleg Sally?" the girls asked, leaning over her fallen form.
They helped Pegleg Sally up, and she looked none the worse for wear.
"Oh, Pegleg Sally!" Kirsten cried, hugging her.
"I'm so glad you're okay!"
"But what about Nellie and May?" I asked.
"They're fine," Kirsten said. "Nellie's been telling us stories."
"Hello, Miss Cheap Lady!" Nellie called.
"May and I did what we could to clean up," she continued, "but it was
hard, since we didn't want to get these pretty clothes dirty."
"It's not easy to make boot covers out of paper towels," May added,
"and we couldn't reach our work clothes to change into. But we
tried our best."
Through their hard work, the apartment looked better already. :)
And my laptop got miraculously set up on a chair too.
Magic! I certainly didn't bring it over to the apartment
"You sweet girls," I said.
With the floor dry, Kirsten explored. "Not only are your DVDs fine," she said, "but here's one of my many fans!"
"I think it's a dehumidifier, Miss Kirsten," Nellie said.
"And there's a bookshelf in the hallway now! I like it!"
Kirsten's grin suddenly vanished. "We know that Nellie and
Pegleg Sally and May and Mini Kit are okay, but what about Evil
Kirsten?" In a panic, she ran into the bathroom.
"Bad sink!" Kirsten said. "They said that the leak started when your pipe broke!"
Realizing that Kirsten was liable to fly into a rage and attack the
pipe, I admonished her to be careful. "Kirsten, are you sure you
didn't break it yourself?"
Kirsten glared at me, then climbed up onto the counter...
"Evil Kirsten!" Kirsten cried. "You look kind of dirty and speckled."
Evil Kirsten didn't seem amused.
Kirsten touched Evil Kirsten to make sure she was really okay.
"I'm glad everyone's safe!" Kirsten said with a sigh.
"Nellie," I asked, "will you share a story with me?"
"Of course, Miss Cheap Lady!" Nellie said with a smile.
"Once upon a time in a faraway land called Florida, there was a lovely mermaid princess named Miss Molly.
"Miss Molly ruled over a lovely little realm, but like us, she wanted to get out of the water and live on dry land.
She dreamed of trading her red hair for brown braids and being a regular girl.
"'I'm sure you have lovely hair right under those curls,' her little attendant said.
"'No, I don't!' Miss Molly said. 'My hair is terrible! I'm never going to be a regular Molly!'
"'There is one way,' the attendant said.
"'Oh no!' Miss Molly said. 'I don't want a new scalp!'
"'But it's a Kemper Plaits scalp,' the attendant said. 'Isn't it pretty?'
"'I'm frightened of getting new hair,' Miss Molly said.
"'But the red hair isn't your real hair either,' the attendant said.
'Take off that curly hair and we'll see what's underneath.
Maybe it's not so bad.'
"So Miss Molly took off the red hair...
The hair beneath was a bit messy.
"'You're very pretty,' the attendant said. 'But if you want to have neater hair, I think you'll need to get new hair.'
"After some consideration, Miss Molly consented.
"It was hard work to give Miss Molly new hair. Her old hair had to come off...
"...and her attendant tried to comfort her through the process.
"But eventually, all the hard work paid off...
"...and Miss Molly looked like regular Molly again! She was very happy to live in a dry realm.
"But," Nellie concluded, "Miss Molly realized that the most important
thing is to have friends who support you, even if things are wet."
"And as long as we're all together," May said, "everything will be all right."
I was so proud of the girls for being so brave. I told them, "I
promise once the apartment is back to normal, we'll have a party to
"Yeah!" Mini Kit said. "All together!"
"Wait a minute," Nellie said. "Where's Miss Kirsten?"
"These fans are loud," Kirsten whispered. "If Miss Cheap Lady gets to leave the apartment, I'm going with her."
See you next time!
*From Coney Island on "The American Experience":
On July 28, 1907, fire broke out at Steeplechase ((Coney Island, New York))...the big wooden park burned for 18 hours. The next day, ((George C.)) Tilyou had a sign up where the entrance had been.
"To inquiring friends: I have troubles today that I did not have
yesterday. I had troubles yesterday that I have not today. On this site
will be erected shortly a better, bigger, greater Steeplechase Park.
Admission to the burning ruins: 10 cents."
My apartment is in considerably better shape than good old Steeplechase
was (or is, for that matter). But I couldn't help but think of
that quote when my first instinct when left alone with the damage was
to do a Kirsten's Xtreme Adventures! :)
As the girls indicated, a pipe broke RIGHT after I left to go out of
town, and I got a call a few hours later. I've spent quite a
while cleaning up, but things should be OK on my end. The
apartment has so far done all they can, including the staff getting my
stuff out of the water's way as well as they could, and the
damages were nowhere near as bad as I expected. To be honest, a
fair amount of what was hit by the water was old school notebooks and
other stuff I didn't really want to keep, but couldn't make myself get
rid of......at least, not without a good excuse. Which I now
I haven't been through everything but the damage so far seems to
be quite limited and has nothing to do with dolls. I am not
worried. If you're the worrying type, please don't you worry
If you came here through the link above, head back to the top and please enjoy the story. :)
On to 9.8.08