~Friday, September 4th, 1936~
quantumcatz: BM: ::it's early on friday morning, Becky has brought back a few teachers now, though she hasn't slept yet::
yarnkittymon: TY: ::has been taking care of the older kids, and has successfully gotten most of them to bed; he looks pretty exhausted himself::
quantumcatz: BM: ::is just back from another trip to the clearing, moves towards Toby:: Take it Ben's still asleep?
yarnkittymon: TY: ::nods; quietly:: We'd probably hear him if he wasn't. ::still can't look closely at Becky::
quantumcatz: BM: ::hesitantly:: You should sleep too
yarnkittymon: TY: ::quietly:: I'm all right.
quantumcatz: BM: You look tired
yarnkittymon: TY: ::more sharply:: I said, I'm all right.
quantumcatz: BM: What's wrong with me saying you should sleep? I'm worried about you!
yarnkittymon: TY: ::coldly:: Well, I didn't *really* die, apparently, so I guess I'm fine!
quantumcatz: BM: If you were fine you wouldn't be snapping at me for saying you look tired
yarnkittymon: TY: ::in a low voice:: Whatever happens, it's better if I stay awake.
quantumcatz: BM: Indefinitely? Or just until you collapse?
yarnkittymon: TY: ::quietly:: I can't just get over it, Becky.
quantumcatz: BM: I know that!
yarnkittymon: TY: Then why are you telling me what to do?
quantumcatz: BM: I was just... ::groans:: Fine, do whatever you want
yarnkittymon: TY: ::softly:: I know you didn't remember me, but I loved you for all I had.
quantumcatz: ((he loved her in the dream world? ))
yarnkittymon: ((Not that she did it, but didn't he? He was totally trying to get her :P ))
yarnkittymon: ((Although at the end he loved Lillian more IMO ;) ))
quantumcatz: ((yeah, was all lillian's fault, otherwise they would just have gone off and fallen in love again ;)))
quantumcatz: BM: ::winces:: I can't change what I did
yarnkittymon: TY: ::nods; softly:: I know. I just...I always thought you were better than me.
quantumcatz: BM: What...?
yarnkittymon: TY: ::quietly:: That you weren't all self-absorbed. That you'd never sell anyone out to save yourself or someone close t oyou.
quantumcatz: BM: ::rubs at her eyes:: I was back in a world i've been running from for a long time, i was scared, i wanted to go home
yarnkittymon: TY: What if I'd done it to you?
quantumcatz: BM: ::softly, looking down:: I'd probably feel the same way you do right now
yarnkittymon: TY: But you know I wouldn't. I still hate myself for leaving Clayton behind, even if he's all right now.
quantumcatz: BM: ::tears spring to her eyes, though she doesn't look up, so he probably can't see them:: I know. I know you wouldn't...
yarnkittymon: TY: ::in a very low voice:: But it wasn't...real. And it's not happening now.
quantumcatz: BM: Saying that won't make what i did any better, as much as i'd like it to
yarnkittymon: TY: ::in a very low voice:: You're my wife, but it's going to take a while.
quantumcatz: BM: ::takes a deep breath, softly:: I love you
yarnkittymon: TY: ::stays still for a little while, then looks up, to see if she seems to mean it::
quantumcatz: BM: ::there are still tears in her eyes, though she's trying to blink them back::
yarnkittymon: TY: ::shudders; softly:: What were you trying to get back to? Did you have a family?
quantumcatz: BM: I...no...i thought Dominick and Fiona really were in Scotland...i had some friends but.... ::winces, knowing how bad that sounds:: I just kept thinking that i wanted to go home and i couldn't spend my life running again
yarnkittymon: TY: ::puts his hands in his pockets, exhaling:: So you were mad.
quantumcatz: BM: I don't know ::bites her lip:: Maybe some subconscious part of me was trying to get back to my real life ::sighs:: Or maybe that's just a big excuse for it all
yarnkittymon: TY: ::softly:: You could go on the run easier than anyone. Why were you against doing it?
quantumcatz: BM: Just because it's easy doesn't mean i'd want to do it. I ran all through my childhood, never settling down - you think i'd want to do that again?
yarnkittymon: TY: ::quietly:: But why fight to defend a *place*? It's about who you're with.
quantumcatz: BM: I was with two strangers!
yarnkittymon: TY: I felt like I knew the two of you!
quantumcatz: BM: ::shakes her head, one of the tears she's been fighting finally falling down her cheek:: Well, i'm sorry, okay, but I didn't
yarnkittymon: TY: ::almost reaches out to wipe her tear, but stops himself; quietly:: I'll check on Ben.
quantumcatz: BM: We'd hear him if he woke up, you said so yourself
yarnkittymon: TY: We're not getting anywhere here.
quantumcatz: BM: ::softly, running a hand through her hair:: I guess not
yarnkittymon: TY: ::quietly:: I'll get over it. It'll just take time.
quantumcatz: BM: ::nods, leaning back against the wall, wrapping her arms around herself::
yarnkittymon: TY: ::quietly:: You know I wouldn't die that easy, anyway.
quantumcatz: BM: ::softly:: I hope not
yarnkittymon: TY: ::shakes his head:: Should've fished the bullet out myself.
quantumcatz: BM: ::winces as she remembers the moment again::
yarnkittymon: TY: ::softly:: But I'm here now, and I'm not going anywhere.
quantumcatz: BM: ::reaches out for his hand but then stops, wincing and clenching her still-raised hand::
yarnkittymon: TY: ::pauses, and then goes over to run his fingers over Becky's; softly:: I'm staying alive, I promise.
quantumcatz: BM: ::smiles weakly at him:: I don't want to lose you. I really don't
yarnkittymon: TY: ::pulls back; quietly:: It was a dream. It didn't mean anything.
quantumcatz: BM: ::sighs and moves her arm back. She's not sure that pretending it meant nothing is really going to help anything. It certainly doesn't feel like it meant nothing to her::
yarnkittymon: TY: ::softly:: You look tired too.
quantumcatz: BM: Yeah, well, there's not been much time for sleeping
yarnkittymon: TY: I'll keep an eye on the kids.
quantumcatz: BM: ::shakes her head, looking rather nervous:: I'd rather...I don't think i'm ready to sleep
yarnkittymon: TY: ::shrugs:: Sure.
quantumcatz: BM: ::winces, understanding how badly he must have felt when she couldn't forgive him::
yarnkittymon: TY: ::heads to the door:: See you in the morning.
quantumcatz: BM: ::softly:: See you later
yarnkittymon: TY: ::slips out silently::
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